Goal line technology in Nigeria? Nah, nothing beats beating up the referee.

Well, our beloved and bungling Vincent Enyeama has come out to root for goal-line technology on the continent after he unashamedly declared Behailu Assefa’s cross didn’t, er, cross the line for the Ethiopian goal. Given the appalling camera angles available to us during that match, Enyeama may reckon the ref and linesmen were in the wrong, but my personal Hawk-eye tells me the ball crossed the line. Victor mis-timed the ball. Lucky him we won the match. His call for goal-line technology on the continent filled me with macabre and funny images, in no way denigrating of my esteemed continent. Why do we need goal-line technology when you can threaten the ref before the match? All he has to tell his bosses is that the watch botched. Happens all the time. Waste of precious money if you ask me. That money can be put better use – bribing the officials. Or what if those aluminum
 urchins somehow manage to sneak into the stadium and steal the goal post? They then sell it to some smelter who turns it into say, beverage tins. So every time you walk past a tin of Milo or Bournvita, the tins vibrate and shouts ‘goal!’ Or perhaps, there will be so much jostling for the N10billion-per-goal-post contract, even FIFA will be
bidding for the contract… I’m certainly not short of imagination here. But the thing is, it’s actually doable. It will only be for World Cup and AFCON qualifying matches, at least in the interim, and will only be in say, two stadia – Calabar and Abuja. And only for Super Eagles matches.